Day 68- Why is Nobody Helping Me?

A thought came up the other day that ‘I am not getting the feedback I need/deserve from other Destonians’. I have been participating on the forum for 9 years. When I first started, it was a lot more active than it is these days, where it is mostly just a few of us posting our Journey to Life blogs. I’ve thought ‘this is supposed to be a platform of support, why is nobody giving me feedback on my writings?” 

Within this is a stance of passivity, where I expect another to do something for me. Yes, there is a general expectation that the platform is there for people to interact and give feedback/support to others, but nobody is being paid to participate there and in no way is there an obligation for this feedback to occur. Thus, my entitlement to receiving feedback is misplaced. 

And, when I really look at it, I haven’t given much feedback to others on the forum. 



I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think I am not getting the feedback I deserve on the Desteni forum.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to believe I deserve feedback on the Desteni forum when and how I want it- instead of considering that forum members are real people with their own lives who may have any number of reasons for not wanting/being able to provide feedback to me



I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not realize that believing I am entitled to feedback on the Desteni forum implies that I desire to receive feedback without explicitly asking for feedback, engendering an attitude of passivity where I expect to receive something for nothing.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not ask for feedback on the Desteni forum, instead of wondering and hoping and wishing to receive feedback on my posts, hiding behind the expectation that, because I read somewhere once that it is ‘supposed’ to be a platform of support, I should receive this support automatically without specifically asking for it if I have not received the support I want/need



When and as I see myself think ‘I am not getting the support I require on the Desteni forum’, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand that I am not entitled to receive anything in this life. If someone wants to give feedback, cool.



When and as I see myself believe I am entitled to receive feedback on the Desteni forum, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand that I am capABLE of asking for feedback if I need it.

When and as I see myself go into fear in relation to asking for feedback on a certain topic/issue I am struggling with, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand that communication is important in getting the specific help I need, otherwise, how can anyone know what I require?



I commit myself to ask for feedback if I need it



Suggest to check out DIP Lite- a FREE online course w/buddy
Desteni
Destonians.com- Destonian Social Network
7 Year Journey to Life- The 7 Year journey to life
Equal Money System- Investigate the proposal for a new economic system to be implemented worldwide in years to come
Living Income Guaranteed- The first step in that economic system
EQAFE- YOUR existential library w/Every question answered for Everyone

Day 6- Mental Illness, Homelessness, and Basic Income

A problem that I have been dealing with that also relates to the last post is that I am homeless.

Thus, its almost as if, in addition to being out of the world system, I am also unable to even use the Desteni tools. Where a Destonian would be able to ground themselves in a safe space while at home, for example, or might have access to the internet/be able to use their computer or a light to write at any time, I do not have that luxury.

The very place where I sleep it is likely not legal for me to be there, but I haven't found a better location so that's where I'm forced to stay. For purposes of wanting to keep a low profile, I've found myself having to suppress certain actions that would ground me in my body, actions that would be available to me if I had a place of my own.

It's almost harder being aware of the Desteni materials than not at this point, as it's like I am in a prison unable to use them. At least in prison I would be allowed to utilize the space of my cell to move my body as I like, instead of always crouching down to hide from others who might cause more strife to my life than already exists.

As I work on aligning the body and the mind to even make the tools of self-forgiveness and self-writing workable, it's hard to differentiate between when I am using my circumstances as an excuse through the mind and when I am actually limited by not having my own place, enough money, etc.

I see many homeless people around me- I would say the extent of the problem is far greater than many realize with countless people sleeping in their cars or under highways where they aren't always seen- but for the most part, they are just like other people. Many of them are deliberate in their abdication and just have taken their spite and refusal to stand up so far that they are having to face the extremely difficult circumstances of being homeless in order to learn.

However, there are those of us who are actually unable to work and to socialize like normal people, homeless or not, due to actual mental illnesses as misalignments in the mind-body-being relationship. For these people, there are not many options: many are simply unemployable and so are forced to sleep in the streets and rely upon handouts and whatever public assistance for which they may qualify. Even in the best case scenario, where I for example have been exposed to the Desteni material and so have an inkling of Process and what is going on, the situation doesn't get better.

So, I would say, on behalf of myself and other mentally ill homeless: please, work towards a basic income, change yourselves and thus the system into one that cares for those unable to care for themselves.  It's the only chance we've got.