Within this post I shall be applying self-forgiveness on what I came up with in the 'Creative Writing' section of the previous post, pasted here for reference.
Creative stage
s- quietex- past lover
Sex - An experience where I quiet past lovers.
An experience where I try to suppress memories of past sex acts.
The negative emotions of past sexual acts.
Creating negative consequences for myself through a natural expression of my body
Feeling like I have to use sex to create a certain experience for myself in which I must avoid negative experiences.
My sexual definition.
An experience where pleasing she in her environment is a burden
An experience that cannot be had unless I have money because a woman doesn’t want to have sex with someone without money
Something women want to engage in from an energetic form while I want to engage in it from a physical expression standpoint and thus a point of conflict in my world.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to treat sex as an experience where I try to quiet memories of past sexual experiences.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I have created a negative energetic charge around memories related to past experiences of sex.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to participate in the behavioral pattern of suppression of sex as a way of trying to avoid those negative emotional charges related to sex I've had in the past.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear creating negative consequences for myself through sex.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that fearing negative consequences for myself through sex implies I have defined sex negatively.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define sex negatively as it relates to those negative emotional charges related to memories I have stored as negative experiences within my mind.
I forgive myself for then allowing and accepting myself to seek to use 'sex' to avoid negative experiences by placing it within a paradigm of perfection where the only way I allow myself to have sex is if the circumstances are absolutely perfect, and in doing so avoiding sex entirely as these circumstances never materialize.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe sex can exist within perfect circumstances.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe sex is a burden that requires pleasing another without achieving satisfaction for myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear having sex without having money.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear having sex with a woman who has not applied self-forgiveness for approaching sex from an energetic self-indulgence point of view.
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