Those of us who have applied ourselves to become better versions of ourselves may be familiar with the cognitive dissonance between the "unlimited" potential of ourselves and the limited nature of world and the people within it. Having to reconcile these differences can be frustrating.
I suggest to investigate Desteni 'I' Process Lite - A FREE online course w/Buddy where you will learn essential life skills.
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Considering the subset of those that discover Desteni having come from a spiritual background, so-to-speak, where they've already bought into a doctrine of transcendence in which they've come to believe they have learned to go beyond even the law of karma and Do Unto Others, there is a tendency to believe that it is because of one's advanced evolution that they have now been blessed with the knowledge and information which Desteni imparts.
Stumbling upon the apparent hidden, true History of the Universe, the idea of an Equal Money System, and a group of people supposedly dedicated to creating heaven on Earth, one may experience these discoveries as part of a natural progression upon a spiritual path that indicates one has made excellent life-choices and is heading in the right direction.
The reality can't be farther from the truth.
In reality, if you have discovered Desteni, you have already reached a point of Too Lateness. Despite the common sense in the Law of Karma as the reality that each one will face what they have done to others, and the implications this brings in terms of the manner in which we must live our lives in this shared Reality, you have made a habit of ignoring what is here. You have allowed this habit to become who you are to such an extent you face a point of Annihilation if you don't become an agent of change in service of Life's Best Self. That is the True Reason why you've found Desteni.
Your abuse has led to the point where you've now manifested support in the form of an external group sharing the only tools which will Save your Ass: self-writing, self-forgiveness, self-honesty, and Common Sense.
I'd suggest visting the Forum where you will find similar beings walking and sharing their processes.
A person in my environment coughs regularly and I have reacted to this within myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to react to J's coughing within annoyance.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be annoyed by coughing, when it could simply be a reaction to J’s environment or for any other reason: I’m sure if they were aware of and in control of their bodies they wouldn’t choose to cough consistently, especially if they knew it was disturbing someone in their environment.
I forgive myself for not allowing myself to not realize being annoyed by coughing indicates I am afraid of confrontation and also compare myself to others.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear confrontation.
I forgive myself for not allowing myself to not realize that I fear confrontation because I fear not surviving within the context of ego-as-self.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear not surviving as ego.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to exist as ego, where the only thing that I base my opinions and actions on is myself.
When and as I see myself react to J coughing in annoyance, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand that I cannot control my environment but rather can view the 10,000 things as straw dogs and choose within a moment whether to direct myself as life or fall subject to the fickle machinations of my preprogrammed existence.
I commit myself to demonstrate courage through self-direction.
When and as I see myself judge J for coughing, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand that this person may have their own reasons for coughing.
I commit myself to exercise compassion through leadership.
When and as I see myself fearing confrontation, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand that confrontation is a gift within this world where leaders are able to utilize the preprogrammed nature and structure of the human mind-being-substance relationship to create change through directing the situation in ways that is best for all. Thus, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hide through the avoidance of confrontation where I know within myself that the problematic preprogrammed structure of the world will always allow me to not face myself. When and as I see myself give up on directing a point to completion, I stop and I breathe. I see and realize that there is limited time to make a difference in this world. I commit myself to utilize the limited nature of preprogrammed existence as the gifted opportunity to be a leader in the world.
When and as I see myself existing as ego, where the only thing I allow myself to be concerned with is my own opinion, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand that this opinion is of the mind and so not real unless it is cross-referenced in reality where the mathematical evidence takes precedence. And thus, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that the nature of this world is based largely not in facts but in the mind of beings abdicating responsibility for life and thus will continue to be subject to change either by myself or by others moving without me.
I commit myself to not wait until it’s too late to move myself but prepare myself to be a leader.